Make the Woman happy

Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don’t get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES

• You make the bed (+1)
• You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)
• You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
• You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)
• In the rain (+8)
• But return with Beer (-5)
• You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
• You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)
• You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
• You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
• It’s her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

• You stay by her side the entire party (0)
• You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)
• Named Tina (-4)
• Tina is a dancer (-10)

HER BIRTHDAY

• You take her out to dinner (0)
• You take her out to dinner and it’s not a sports bar (+1)
• Okay, it’s a sports bar (-2)
• And it’s all-you-can- eat night (-3)
• It’s a sports bar, it’s all-you-can- eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

• You take her to a movie (+2)
• You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
• You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
• You take her to a movie you like (-2)
• It’s called ‘DeathCop’ (-3)
• You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE

• You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
• You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
• You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
• You say, “It doesn’t matter, you have one too.” (-8000)

ENJOY THE ‘BIG’ QUESTION

• She asks, “Do I look fat?” (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]
• You hesitate in responding (-10)
• You reply, “Where?” (-35)
• Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION

• When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
• You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
• You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
• She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)

"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain Transplant. It’s an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the Brain Yourselves."

The family members sat silently as they absorbed the news. After a great Length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?" The doctor quickly responded, "R s 50,000 for a male brain, and R s 200 for a Female brain."

The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding Eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man unable to Control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire Group, "It’s just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the Price of the female brains, because they’ve actually been used, the male Brains are hardly ever used by the owners. So they are as good as new"