I don’t contemplate the future
I can’t recollect the past
Lost in the land of limbo
In a time that may not last
The days now pass before me
In an alternating blur
Confusion reigns within me
For a past that’s lost somewhere
I know I am, for I exist
The photographs don’t lie
Pictures of a life now lost
But I don’t remember why
I see a new life every hour
In a place that’s not the same
No hint of recognition
For turmoil is to blame
I write these words upon this page
For others now to see
But don’t ask me if I wrote them
As I can’t remember me.
No matter what happened
Between me and you
You were always there
And showed me our love was true
I made you seem perfect
But you did hurt me before
I never told anyone
About that time you broke my heart
But no matter what you did
I always did forgive
I still believe in your loving words
That took away all my pain and hurt
Three years, five months
We were engaged
Even if I was young
For the future we could wait
So many times we lost our place
But it’s hard to be together
When we’re miles away
So maybe it was fate
Many nights I cried
And got on my knees
Making sure God listened
That I needed you next to me
Today I still love you
More than I ever did
But I guess the love you had
For me took a scary twist
I guess you found another
That is near you
It hurts because you didn’t say Goodbye
But I remember..
The last words you said were..
I Love You
Smiling is not my reality,
I smile to fool this world.
This is how I pretend to be,
But this is not the truth of my life.
Drowning in a flood of tears,
But tears are my destiny.
My vision a blur as I fulfill,
And this is how I meant to be.
As you regarded suicide as sin,
I am not against you my heart is pure.
Fate is mocking with an evil,
Grin, surrounded in a blackness so deep.
I walk, I see, but survive no more,
I am dead inside, in darkness I weep.
You know I love you like ever before,
Forgive me as in my grave I lay.
Free me of this pain and let me die,
I just can’t bare it any more.
Life is a prison,
No one to listen,
To hear when you shout.
If you fall it don’t matter,
There’s no one to care.
Watching freedom is painful,
For those locked away.
Seeing joy, love and happiness,
Another price that you pay.
Hide the pain,
Carry on ,
Routine is the key.
Don’t let on that you’re not,
What you’re pretending to be.
Whenever any thought came into my mind,
I wrote it on the last page of my notebook.
Whenever the lectures were boring,
I played games, used to draw pictures
on the last page of my notebook.
When I was angry with anyone and
wanted to flood my anger,
I used the last page of my notebook.
When I discovered I was in love with him,
I shared my thoughts with the
Last page of my notebook.
When I was really wrong,
And I wanted to confess it to someone,
I told about it to last page of my notebook.
When I wanted not to forget some points taught by my teacher
I discussed it with the last page of my notebook.
Still many things are there to be written
on the last page of my notebook.
I don’t contemplate the future
